14-year-old Loren is the unlikely hero of Dogface. Loren's obsessed with all things military: Special Forces, secret missions, rules and regulations ?it's all so finite and orderly. Especially compared to other parts of Loren's life. His mom, for example, keeps introducing him to a string of loser boyfriends, and each time Loren responds by dreaming up creative ways to trash the boyfriends? stuff. The latest one, a golf pro, is so irritating that Loren decides to stage a night raid and vandalize the pro's beloved golf course. When the mission goes embarrassingly awry, Loren's mom sends him to Camp Ascend!, a remote facility that specializes in whipping ?mixed-up? teens back into shape. Camp Ascend! was founded by Ray Kellogg, a.k.a. the ?Colonel, ? who claims a distinguished military background but is really a con man with zero military experience but a few convictions for fraud. The Colonel runs the place with his overly tanned wife (who hates being out in the woods) and her manic brother (who doesn?t like kids). When Loren figures out what the camp and the Colonel are really about, he finds himself with a real-life mission: redeem himself and the other delinquents at Camp Ascend!, and take the place down.