Introduction

After many years in the closet, death has emerged as a part

of life. Over the past twenty years a plethora of books, seminars,

and personal accounts devoted to the process of dying have

been produced. However, few of these efforts have been di-

rected at those people whose involvement counts the most--

the family and friends of the dying and the dying person

undergoing the awesome process of entering one of "death s

ten thousand different doors."

This book fills that gap and is a welcome change. It is read-

able, pays attention to the practical problems and issues sur-

rounding death, and most importantly, provides guidelines in

dealing with them. Following awareness of an impending death,

there are always questions, and this book raises them in the

sequence in which they are most likely to occur. It then proceeds

to answer these questions in an informative, reassuring, and

practical way. It is a book that will be of active help for those

involved in the death of a loved one.

Information from professional and technical literature on

death and dying is combined in these pages with knowledge

derived from life experiences. In addition to practical matters

that range from bill paying to funeral planning, questions which

are seldom addressed are raised in this book on such topics as:

sex and the dying person, suicide, dealing with difficult or dis-

honest doctors, "pulling the plug" on life support machines,

negotiating with a funeral director and choosing a cemetery,

helping the very young dying child, pathologic grieving, speak-

ing about death to children, and negative feelings on the part