How many of us wonder what might have been? After her mother's death, six-year-old Jaycee is neglected by her alcoholic father and decides she would rather be beaten than ignored. She grows up a foul-mouthed hellion who takes flak off no one, and she lives in fear of anyone finding out she is also a love-starved little girl terrified of being abandoned in the dark. Her intrepid spirit carries her forward until she is tripped up in college by a poor little rich boy who turns out to be the male version of herself. Jaycee and Bud are an emotional paradox: drawn together because they're so much alike and constantly at war for the same reason. They fight as frequently and as physically as they make love, hurting each other even as they become two halves of a whole. Jaycee's rollercoaster life with Bud is gritty, touching, and funny, and just when she thinks she's made it safely to the end of the ride, her childhood and her first love come back to derail her.