"There are friends, I think we can't imagine living without. People who are sisters to us, or brothers. Jimmy was one of those. I never thought I might have to go through life without him. I never thought he might be killed by a drunken driver or anything else. Who thinks about things like that when you're seventeen? If I had known ahead of time what was going to happen to him, I would have gone crazy. I guess I did go a little crazy. My Aunt Lo, who's a hospital psychiatrist, says grief travels a certain route-that if you could plot it out on a map you'd have a line that twists and weaves and eventually ends up near the point of departure. I say "near" because although

you may survive the grief, you won't ever be exactly the same. It took me a long time to learn that, and sometimes the whole experience comes back on me and I have to learn it all over again."

— Julie Reece Deaver (Say Goodnight, Gracie)

Morgan and Jimmy were kids together, whirling around the porch on hot summer days. They've been friends forever, and by now they know each other inside out. They do everything together--from cutting high school to go into the city to coaching each other at dance auditions and acting workshops. They even argue well. A perfect friendship. Best friends. For life.

So how could life be so right and then be so wrong? After a terrible accident, Morgan suddenly has to face life alone. Without Jimmy around, though, it's like the best part of her has died. How could he do this to her? And why is love so hard?

`Morgan and Jimmy have grown up together, and are close, loving friends. When Jimmy is killed in an automobile accident, Morgan falls apart and slowly begins a desperate spiral into depression. A wrenching first novel that combines a teenager's emotional trauma with a love story in the best modern tradition.' —BL. `Memorable.' —SLJ.

<awards> 1988 Best Books for Young Adults (ALA)

1989 Recommended Books for Reluctant Young Adult Readers (ALA)

1988 Young Adult Editors' Choices (BL)

Young Adult Choices for 1990 (IRA)

Children's Books of 1988 (Library of Congress)

1988 Books for the Teen Age (NY Public Library)