SESSION ONE<br > Rebuilding a<br > Marriage<br > THE UNHAPPY COUPLE<br > Tom and Jean entered the counselor s waiting room in silence and<br >sat on opposite ends of the couch. The fact that they did not sit close<br >together said a lot about the mood of their marriage. It was one of<br >separateness， discord， and a growing dissatisfaction with each other.<br >The small waiting room filled with the tension of unspoken words.<br > Most Saturdays found Tom on the golf course. But not today. In-<br >stead of chasing golf balls， Tom sat chasing answers to some tough<br >questions: Why was their marriage failing? What had caused their rela-<br >tionship to deteriorate so badly that they both saw divorce as the only<br >~vay out? Who was at fault?<br > This wasn t the first time Tom had asked these questions. Even<br >though he considered himself a fair and objective person， his conclu-<br >sions were always the same--Jean was mostly to blame. She was a<br >nagging， critical， disapproving wife. Her sharp tongue and you-never-<br >do-anything-right attitude toward him were the cause. Deep down<br >Tom wondered if this marriage counselor could change her into the<br >gentle， nurturing， affirming spouse he wanted. Tom caught a glimpse of<br >Jean over the top of the magazine he pretended to read. She was still an<br >attractive ladymbut not a friend.<br > Jean sat biting her lip. She was close to tears as she thought about<br >the unhappiness in their marriage， but she was determined not to cry<br >in the counselor s office. Jean was also thinking about what had caused<br >their marriage to collapse. She knew exactly who the villain was. Tom!<br >He had never given their marriage top priority. For eighteen years，<br > 13<br >