Alfie Kohn is the author of nine previous books, including Punished by Rewards and The Schools Our Children Deserve, that have helped to shape the thinking of parents and educators across the country and abroad. He lectures widely and lives (actually) with his family in the Boston are and (virtually) at www.alfiekohn.org.
Most parenting guides begin with the question "How can we get kids to do what they're told?" and then proceed to offer various techniques for controlling them. In this truly groundbreaking book, nationally respected educator Alfie Kohn begins instead by asking, "What do kids need - and how can we meet those needs?" What follows from that quetion are ideas for working with children rather than doing things to them.
One basic need all children have, Kohn argues, is to be loved unconditionally, to know that they will be accepted even if they screw up or fall short. Yet conventional approaches to parenting such as punishments (including "time-outs"), rewards (including positive reinforcement), and other forms of control teach children that they are loved only when they please us or impress us. Kohn cites a body of powerful, and largely unknown, research detailing the damage caused by leading children to believe they must earn our approval. That's precisely the message children derive from common discipline techniques, even though it's not the message most parents intend to send.
More than just another book about discipline, though, Unconditional Parenting addresses the ways parents think about, feel about, and act with their children. It invites them to question their most basic assumptions about raising kids while offering a wealth of practical strategies for shifting from "doing to" to "working with" parenting - including how to replace praise with the unconditional support that children need to grow into healthy, caring, responsible people. This is an eye-opening, paradigm-shattering book that will reconnect readers to their own best instincts and inspire them to become better parents.
發表於2025-02-09
UNCONDITIONAL PARENTING Moving from Rewards and Pu 2025 pdf epub mobi 電子書 下載
把你的孩子當盤菜 【文】王傳言 你希望你的孩子未來是什麼樣子的?麵對這個疑問你可能會想齣很多答案。但是,你有沒有想過一個問題:你的孩子希望自己未來是什麼樣子的。你的孩子是按照你的路數去走完自己的路還是要按照自己的路數去經營人生,這一點至關重要也是該書的終極思...
評分《無條件養育》的作者認為應當慎用錶揚,就如同慎用批評一樣,孩子不應該因為做某事而被愛,應該因為他們是孩子而被愛。行為主義的方法如同馴狗,將食物、玩具、錶揚(或者說成人的喜愛)作為奬勵和懲罰的手段,使年幼的孩子時時生活擔心自己會受錶揚還是批評的巨大壓力...
評分所有父母對孩子都是有愛的,但怎麼愛,通過什麼樣的方式去愛,不是每個人都能從開始就選擇正確的路徑的。 我們被養育的過程中,一般都會被賦予各種各樣的象徵意義,比如要拿第一,比如要給父母爭光,比如。。。 所以,全部摒棄自己受到而內化的經驗,是一件不容易的事,畢竟幾...
評分把你的孩子當盤菜 【文】王傳言 你希望你的孩子未來是什麼樣子的?麵對這個疑問你可能會想齣很多答案。但是,你有沒有想過一個問題:你的孩子希望自己未來是什麼樣子的。你的孩子是按照你的路數去走完自己的路還是要按照自己的路數去經營人生,這一點至關重要也是該書的終極思...
評分有多少父母都舉著愛的大旗對孩子的心靈造成創傷和痛苦?有多少傢長在不知不覺中把自己自卑,挫敗,虛榮和焦慮傳染給瞭孩子?不看這本書,我幾乎要忘瞭自己曾經走過的心路。我知道有時候時間是治愈一切的良藥,沒人喜歡自揭傷疤重溫過去。但其實沒有什麼過去和未來,當下發...
圖書標籤: 育兒 Parenting 英文原版 教育 心理學 教育理念 Education 傢庭
車軲轆話翻來倒去的說,真的很佩服老外。不過這個概念我非常接受
評分車軲轆話翻來倒去的說,真的很佩服老外。不過這個概念我非常接受
評分車軲轆話翻來倒去的說,真的很佩服老外。不過這個概念我非常接受
評分一,作為父母,無條件地愛孩子,是由於ta是你的孩子,而不是由於ta做瞭哪些可以讓你自豪的事。這種無條件的愛,既不是溺愛,也不是對你的孩子市恩市義(所謂養育之恩,即屬市恩市義)。二,做齣恰當決定的能力需要從幼年一點點培養、曆練,並讓孩子瞭解每一項決定都與責任的承擔有關。學習做齣恰當決定的途徑,恰恰是通過做決定本身,而非通過聽從他人指導。三,要有勇氣、有能力麵對和質疑自己的養育經曆以及被養育的經曆。是的,人通常不願意質疑自己、質疑自己親近的人,尤其是自己父母。但誰都不是完人,包括你和你父母,所以,隻要用心,一定會找到可以改進的地方,使自己變得更好並嘗試做更好的父母。
評分一,作為父母,無條件地愛孩子,是由於ta是你的孩子,而不是由於ta做瞭哪些可以讓你自豪的事。這種無條件的愛,既不是溺愛,也不是對你的孩子市恩市義(所謂養育之恩,即屬市恩市義)。二,做齣恰當決定的能力需要從幼年一點點培養、曆練,並讓孩子瞭解每一項決定都與責任的承擔有關。學習做齣恰當決定的途徑,恰恰是通過做決定本身,而非通過聽從他人指導。三,要有勇氣、有能力麵對和質疑自己的養育經曆以及被養育的經曆。是的,人通常不願意質疑自己、質疑自己親近的人,尤其是自己父母。但誰都不是完人,包括你和你父母,所以,隻要用心,一定會找到可以改進的地方,使自己變得更好並嘗試做更好的父母。
UNCONDITIONAL PARENTING Moving from Rewards and Pu 2025 pdf epub mobi 電子書 下載